Tuesday, October 8, 2024

Top 19 Movies to Watch during Snowmageddon 2019

It’s happening. It’s actually going to snow this year. And it’s going to be epic. We hope. Because we’ve got a long list of movies to get through, in no particular order.

  1. Better Off Dead (1985)

    then go figure out the street value of the snow mound out at the curb. Simple math.

  2. Fast and Furious 3: Tokyo Drift (2006)

    then go out and play ‘Toledo Drift’. If you film it, send it to us top secret.

  3. Every Terminator movie ever.

    then go to sleep. These are exhausting.

  4. The Big Lebowski (1998)

    then set up a snow bowling alley in your back yard.

  5. Desperado (1995)

    don’t do anything they do in this movie.

  6. Grandma’s Boy (2006)

    … make sure to watch this with your grandmother.

  7. Brazil (1985)

    then go start a Facebook argument about a ‘consumer-driven dystopia’, bureaucracy and the like. Tag us.

  8. Snakes on a Plane (2006)

    … then listen to ‘Go the F*ck to Sleep’—one of the best (narrated by Sam Jackson himself) children’s books of all time.

  9. The Godfather (1972)

    then speak in a Michael Corleone accent for the remainder of the day.

  10. Taxi Driver (1976)

    then call an Uber to take you to the sledding hill, since we’re operating with the expectation that you’ve been intoxicated since 10am.

  11. The Shining (1980)

    … try not to do anything they do in this movie, either.

  12. Every Star Wars movie. Ever. (This better be a long snow.)

    … then Han/Leia roll-play. We’re doing an October issue of Snowmageddon 2019 births.

  13. The Holy Mountain (1973)

    then give all of your worldly goods away and let us know how that goes.

  14. Warriors (1979)

    then get the gang together, dress up like mimes (or something equally as match-y), and paint the town red. ‘Come out and play.’ 

  15. Best in Show (2000)

    then get your friends together and put on a high-stakes dog show. Winner takes all.

  16. Step Brothers (2008)

    then, since your most likely the songbird of your generation, you should probably go caroling with ONLY songs from this movie. Don’t forget to hug your brother. You just gotta.

  17. Lord of the Rings Trilogy

    … then go shave your feet.

  18. Amélie (2001)

    then, gather all of the garden gnomes you can and drop them off at the corner of Secor and Alexis, in memoriam of the Christmas Weed.

  19. Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986)

    … then do everything they do in the movie.

It’s happening. It’s actually going to snow this year. And it’s going to be epic. We hope. Because we’ve got a long list of movies to get through, in no particular order.

  1. Better Off Dead (1985)

    then go figure out the street value of the snow mound out at the curb. Simple math.

  2. Fast and Furious 3: Tokyo Drift (2006)

    then go out and play ‘Toledo Drift’. If you film it, send it to us top secret.

  3. Every Terminator movie ever.

    then go to sleep. These are exhausting.

  4. The Big Lebowski (1998)

    then set up a snow bowling alley in your back yard.

  5. Desperado (1995)

    don’t do anything they do in this movie.

  6. Grandma’s Boy (2006)

    … make sure to watch this with your grandmother.

  7. Brazil (1985)

    then go start a Facebook argument about a ‘consumer-driven dystopia’, bureaucracy and the like. Tag us.

  8. Snakes on a Plane (2006)

    … then listen to ‘Go the F*ck to Sleep’—one of the best (narrated by Sam Jackson himself) children’s books of all time.

  9. The Godfather (1972)

    then speak in a Michael Corleone accent for the remainder of the day.

  10. Taxi Driver (1976)

    then call an Uber to take you to the sledding hill, since we’re operating with the expectation that you’ve been intoxicated since 10am.

  11. The Shining (1980)

    … try not to do anything they do in this movie, either.

  12. Every Star Wars movie. Ever. (This better be a long snow.)

    … then Han/Leia roll-play. We’re doing an October issue of Snowmageddon 2019 births.

  13. The Holy Mountain (1973)

    then give all of your worldly goods away and let us know how that goes.

  14. Warriors (1979)

    then get the gang together, dress up like mimes (or something equally as match-y), and paint the town red. ‘Come out and play.’ 

  15. Best in Show (2000)

    then get your friends together and put on a high-stakes dog show. Winner takes all.

  16. Step Brothers (2008)

    then, since your most likely the songbird of your generation, you should probably go caroling with ONLY songs from this movie. Don’t forget to hug your brother. You just gotta.

  17. Lord of the Rings Trilogy

    … then go shave your feet.

  18. Amélie (2001)

    then, gather all of the garden gnomes you can and drop them off at the corner of Secor and Alexis, in memoriam of the Christmas Weed.

  19. Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986)

    … then do everything they do in the movie.

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