It’s happening. It’s actually going to snow this year. And it’s going to be epic. We hope. Because we’ve got a long list of movies to get through, in no particular order.
-
Better Off Dead (1985)
… then go figure out the street value of the snow mound out at the curb. Simple math.
-
Fast and Furious 3: Tokyo Drift (2006)
… then go out and play ‘Toledo Drift’. If you film it, send it to us top secret.
-
Every Terminator movie ever.
… then go to sleep. These are exhausting.
-
The Big Lebowski (1998)
… then set up a snow bowling alley in your back yard.
-
Desperado (1995)
… don’t do anything they do in this movie.
-
Grandma’s Boy (2006)
… make sure to watch this with your grandmother.
-
Brazil (1985)
… then go start a Facebook argument about a ‘consumer-driven dystopia’, bureaucracy and the like. Tag us.
-
Snakes on a Plane (2006)
… then listen to ‘Go the F*ck to Sleep’—one of the best (narrated by Sam Jackson himself) children’s books of all time.
-
The Godfather (1972)
… then speak in a Michael Corleone accent for the remainder of the day.
-
Taxi Driver (1976)
… then call an Uber to take you to the sledding hill, since we’re operating with the expectation that you’ve been intoxicated since 10am.
-
The Shining (1980)
… try not to do anything they do in this movie, either.
-
Every Star Wars movie. Ever. (This better be a long snow.)
…Â then Han/Leia roll-play. We’re doing an October issue of Snowmageddon 2019 births.
-
The Holy Mountain (1973)
… then give all of your worldly goods away and let us know how that goes.
-
Warriors (1979)
… then get the gang together, dress up like mimes (or something equally as match-y), and paint the town red. ‘Come out and play.’Â
-
Best in Show (2000)
… then get your friends together and put on a high-stakes dog show. Winner takes all.
-
Step Brothers (2008)
… then, since your most likely the songbird of your generation, you should probably go caroling with ONLY songs from this movie. Don’t forget to hug your brother. You just gotta.
-
Lord of the Rings Trilogy
… then go shave your feet.
-
Amélie (2001)
… then, gather all of the garden gnomes you can and drop them off at the corner of Secor and Alexis, in memoriam of the Christmas Weed.
-
Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986)
… then do everything they do in the movie.