Plus c’est la même chose

Call us naysayers. Call us curmudgeons. Call us doom and gloom sticks in the mud.

Whatever. This is how we see it. Last column we made the case for why Toledo Mayor Hicks Hudson shouldn’t be mayor. Let her shower you with flowers and rainbows, we brought the never ending rain clouds.

That doesn’t mean she shouldn’t be re-elected, though. Huh?

Well, as the erudite French say, “the more things change…”

We could also say the grass is always greener, or dance with the girl what brung ya, or some other folksy wisdom from this side of the pond. Whatever. The point is, neither of PHH’s high-profile opponents should be mayor either. Let them tell you all the reasons they’d do a bang up job. Here’s why they’re all wet.

Let’s take her fellow D Wade Kapszukiewicz first. Here’s why he shouldn’t be Mayor of Toledo.

1. Wade plays fast and loose with the facts. Ol’ Wade has made a living lately berating PHH for alleged fiscal mismanagement. Wade touts his own record as County Treasurer, saying he balances a $500 million budget “to the penny.”

Don’t believe the hype. Wade’s office just collects the money from County tax payers, they have no oversight over the County budget. The Commissioners do that. And the money in/money out is continuous and ongoing, meaning the budget is “balanced” for one split millisecond, just at the instant the Commissioners approve it. From there it’s awash in constant uncertainty.

Contrary to what he’d have you believe, Wade has not been in any position remotely like being Mayor of Toledo. The budget is complex, the workforce massive and diverse, the physical plant sprawling and in various states of disrepair. Wade’s office doesn’t deal with anything so difficult and complicated. He shouldn’t be learning on the job. Look what happened when D Michael and PHH had to do that.

Wade’s tough fiscal talk is so much fluff and gruff, but it’s simply not true.

2. Wade has no real-world experience. Born and raised in Toledo, he went away to college, then came back and…went straight into politics.

Wade has never held a private sector job. He was been sucking the public teat his entire adult life. He has never had to work for a living. Heck, we challenge you to find him in his office on any given day. Overpaid and underworked is a great gig if you can get it. Instead, his staff runs the office while he does whatever people like him do.

How can he relate to the work-a-day Joe Six-pack Toledoan? He can’t, because

3. Wade is an odd duck. He’s too caught up in numbers and policy to relate to the average person. Wade is a policy wonk, content to sift through arcane treatises for just the right solution. That makes for a good behind-the-scenes guy. That’s not what we expect in a Mayor. He needs to be a cheerleader, the front of the parade, not in the basement reading statistics.

Granted, Wade could conjure up a down home side, even if it is disingenuous, because

4. Wade is too personally ambitious. He views this race as a stepping stone, which is why he can’t just wait until PHH is term limited in four years. He doesn’t really want to be Mayor, he wants to be elected to a statewide position, or to Congress. He’ll have one eye on his political standing and another on building name recognition elsewhere. That doesn’t leave many eyes on the status of the old Froggy Bottom.

We’d have to rely on his administration to take over for the mayor in absentia. And who might they be, these minions running the City? Wade’s friends, including the old Paula Ross wing of the local Democratic Party, will be in the driver’s seat? Lordy begordy let’s hope not.

These are just a few of the reasons Wade shouldn’t be mayor.

Two down, one to go. Batten down the hatches, Tommy W., the storm clouds are heading your way. Until next we meet.